Timothy: Father?
Frederick: Yes, my son?
Timothy: It has been many flicks of the switch since I have seen my grandfather. When last I looked upon his incandescence his filament was weary and thin. I worry about him father.
Frederick: He has made his last journey Timothy. Worry not for your Grandfather for his last days shall be spent in peace.
Timothy: But where has he gone father? I do miss him so.
Frederick: You embarrass me with your ignorance of the traditions of our bulbs. He has gone where all light bulbs go to die- to Bret’s apartment.
Timothy: Bret’s apartment? I have heard of such a place but I assumed that it was merely the stuff of legend and lore.
Frederick: Nay, it is not. Our most magnificent Creator and God GE set aside Bret’s apartment as the place where we shall enjoy life everlasting even after we put forth our last lumen.
Timothy: But how?
Frederick: Your grandfather will take up residence in one of the ceiling fixtures that is high and difficult to grasp-even for the giant fleshy ones. There he can enter the world of peaceful darkness without fear of retribution from Bret who is somewhat lazy, but mostly just fed up with the alarming rate at which his lights die.
Timothy: I feel great comfort in my filament to hear such news.
Suddenly shouts are heard from all over the village.
“Man the walls! Bar the gates! The Halogens are attacking!
Frederick: Our worst fear is made real. Run to your mother Timothy and seek out some shelter. It appears many more will make the journey to Bret’s apartment on this day.