It was a lonely stretch of road, precisely Someplace between Nowhere and Location. I had no idea where I was goin’ to and just slightly more of an idea as to where I’d been. All I knew for sure was that I didn’t want to be where I was, wherever that was.
I didn’t even notice him standing there. All of a sudden he just kinda caught my eye, like a shootin’ star. Like you think you saw it, but you can never really be sure. You can either decide you saw it and roll with it or decide that you didn’t and roll with that. But that time I decided I did see it. And it was a him. Now I couldn’t describe him, per se. Still can’t. Like I can see him in my mind’s eye, but I can’t articulate it, get me? But I pulled over, thought I’d cut him a break. Nearly hit him with my Le Baron, too, I recall.
”Need a lift?” I asked.
”Hmm. Do I?” he replied. His eye twitched. Some might characterize it as a wink. I am not one of those people.
”Well, I’d hope so. Otherwise you’d just be a damned fool for standing out here in this heat.”
”Hmm. Would I?” he said, and eye-twitched.
”Um. I think so. That or cold-blooded.”
He flung his satchel into the back and took his place in the passenger seat. I would be lyin’ if I told you I wasn’t a bit on guard. This was a strange one, no doubt, but somethin’ inside me (let’s call it my instinct), it told me I wasn’t in danger. It’s been wrong before and it’s been wrong since. But I trusted it anyway. I’m very gullible when it comes to my instinct.
”So. Where are you headed, stranger?” I thought it fit to ask. Being as I was driving and all.
”Where do you think I’m headed?” Eye-twitch. This was getting a bit annoying.
”Gee, stranger, how could I know. Could be anywhere on this earth.”
”Could it?” Short pause. Eye-twitch.
”Um, yeah, it could.” We sat for a few minutes in silence. It was awkward. I spoke again. “You headed home? See your folks?”
”Hmm. I am?” Eye-twitch. “I will?” Two eye-twitches.
”I guess you are, then. And will, then. I’ll take you as far as I’m going, though to be honest I don’t actually know where that is just yet. But when I get where I’m goin’ you’ll have to find a different ride.”
”Will I?” Staring, non-twitching eyes.
”Will you?” Eyes on the road.
”Or will I be exactly where I need to be?” Eye-twitches. A lot of ‘em.
This had crossed over to being significantly annoying.
”Wait a minute now, stranger. You’re saying you’ll be where you need to be when I get to where I don’t know I’m goin’ to?”
Pause. I’d characterize it as long, but it could have been short. It was one of these time-stands-still pauses that worm their way into appropriate moments. Maybe a minute passed. Maybe three years. According to the clock, it was closer to a minute. I tend to believe it. I’m gullible when it comes to clocks.
He spoke: “Yes”. Eye-twitches. In spades.
What were my options now? I picked this guy up because I thought he’d send me in some sort of direction, since I didn’t know where the hell I was goin’. That wasn’t happening, clearly. All I had now was a coy hitchhiker with some kind of retinal irritation. And I didn’t even know his name!
”What’s your name stranger?” At the very least I could rectify one issue.
”Hmm. My name?” Spasmodic blinking.
”Man, do you need some Visine or something?”
”I don’t know, do I?” I swear his lashes started buzzing.
”Yes! Yes, dammit, you do. There’re drops in the glove compartment. Convertible driving can be sandy driving. Now please, name. C’mon. Out with it.”
”The Point.” Artificial tears lubricated his corneas.
”Ah. The Point.”
It all made sense now. I’m gullible when it comes to sense.