The Evolution of Hands-Free Cell Phone Technology
- Smart scientists/entrepreneurs invent cell phones because they have enormous egos and feel that the world has a strong desire to be able to get in touch with them no matter where they are.
- These scientists/entrepreneurs use their cell phones all the time both so as to set an example for the buying public as well as satiate their enormous egos.
- As a result of the various radio/micro/tidal/friendly waves that are being pumped into the heads of these individuals they develop large brain tumors and become insane. They are sent to insane asylums where they talk loudly and passionately to people/phantoms/squirrels that do not really exist.
- The children of these scientists/entrepreneurs, in an attempt to make their parents seem normal once again, develop hands-free cell phone technology so that everyone in America will walk around appearing to talk to people/phantoms/squirrels that do not exist.
- The change is slow in some cities/towns/hamlets/productions of Hamlet where they cannot understand why there would be crazy people just walking around the streets. In New York City, nobody blinks an eye.
And now, to promote a fair presentation of both sides on every issue and so as not to offend anyone.
The Creation of Hands-Free Cell Phone Technology
- And God said, “Let there be hands-free cell phone technology.” So God created hands-free cell phone technology and everyone looked as though they were talking to people/phantoms/squirrels that did not exist. And God saw that it was good. And there was evening and there was morning, the 2,555,347th day.