“Hey, what’s up, you’re looking mighty fine tonight.
“Well, Disaster, I only speak the truth.
“Oh Miss D, this old thing? You’re too kind.
“Yeah, well I guess people have always said I look good in green. So what’s a pretty lady like yourself doing out all alone tonight?
“Well, I guess that makes two of us…. Say, let me buy you a drink.
“Yeah, I guess you do already have one there, just didn’t see it I guess.
“What? Yeah. Well. I suppose I am kinda nervous. I just…. Oh, nevermind.
“Nah, I just realized how pathetic I must sound. I mean, I’m acting like an idiot with you, Disaster, and, and I was practically drooling over that waitress, Remarkable Achievement, earlier. I guess I’m still worked up over the break-up.
“Oh, I didn’t mention…? Well, I just broke up with my girlfriend, General Day-to-day Life Without Any Noticeable Successes or Failures. This is kind of my first time back on the dating scene. I’ve just been so lonely lately….
“Thanks, you’re sweet, Miss D, but let’s stop talking about this. Let’s talk about us! Why don’t we go out sometime, why don’t-
“The date’s over? What date? What- no- wait! Where’re you going!?
“But we didn’t even do anything, we didn’t- and I’ve got tons of fun stuff we could do! I have so much more in common with you than other girls. We, we could run with scissors, or star in a movie with Pauly Shore, or, or get involved in a land war in Asia…heck I’d even be up for going in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
“Yeah, or we could do that. I just don’t see why you’d want me to write a poorly fleshed out Thought for T.J. Monkey’s where I take a common expression and stretch it out into a entire scene. Sure, it’d be fun for me, but what does it have to do with Disaster, I mean I don’t….
“Wait a sec….
“DAMN IT!”