Yesterday I got a fortune cookie that read:
“Keep your plans secret for now.”
Well, the cookie didn’t actually read that. I read it, but it was written on the paper inside the cookie. Know what I’m sayin’?
Immediately upon reading this so-called fortune I thought to myself:
“What plans? And why should they be secret? And who wants to know them? And if they fall into the wrong hands what will it mean for Truth, Justice, and the Scott way.”
The American way is important too, as is the United Way, curds and whey, the wayward son, and the way less traveled (note the poetic license of changing “road” to “way” the better to fit my train of thought…choo choo).
In this case, however, I was most concerned with the Scott way because, like I said, I was thinking to myself, and what with myself being me, that is, Scott, I was who myself was most concerned with. Get it?
Anyways, I ran through my mind…well, not literally, though that would be pretty cool to shrink down and run through your own mind. It’d be like the movie Innerspace. But that isn’t what happened in this case. In this case, I considered all my “plans” and came to the stunning realization that I didn’t really have any. At least none that were pressing or needed to be kept “secret for now.”
But, as we all know a fortune cookie fortune is never wrong, so I quickly came up with a plan.
It’s evil and diabolical. Not for any reason other than that’s always the easiest plan to come up with. Good plans are few and far between. You know “of mice and men” and whatnot.
So, yeah, I now have an evil plan that I’m keeping secret for now.
I figure I’ll reveal it just as it’s about to come to fruition and right after I take as my captive the one person who can stop it.
That always seems to work out in Bond movies.
No, wait…