Scene i. The White House.
Enter GEORGE [The King] and TENET [Duke of Intelligence]
Trumpets.
GEORGE
Now is the summer of our economic rebirth,
That plays about us with a monkey’s mirth,
Turned to winter by chill winds of gathering war,
So that our people may be safe no more.
For weapons of mass destruction, I fear,
Are in the hands of our enemies near.
Speak then to me, oh Oracle of Langley,
Tell me if your knowledge warns how it shall be.
TENET
I have heard tell of a man named Nachbad,
Who lives not far from the center of Baghdad.
He tells of great missiles pointed to the sky,
And poised to burst from their lairs and fly.
He tells of restoring a nation’s glory,
With these weapons shaped as a suppository.
We ask, “How can you know what is within,
These shiny bringers of mass destruction?”
Says Nachbad, “I have seen come rocks from Niger,
That set off clicks on the counter of Geiger.”
GEORGE
Surely, he doth prophesy our doom!
I am consumed within a cloud of gloom.
Trumpets. Enter RICHARD [Duke of Halliburton]
GEORGE
How now, my trusted Duke, Dick!
The news today doth make me sick.
Tenet, here before you stands,
And tells of threats that may reach our lands.
RICHARD
What say you, good duke, can this be true?
Is it possible our time on Earth is through?
TENET
Verily, my lord, my tongue ache to tell
The Middle East is poised on the brink of hell!
RICHARD
Such it has always been, in this sandy land,
Since Israel first did make its stand.
Why suddenly face we certain war,
Anymore imminently than we did before?
TENET
Word comes from sources dark and deep
That new weapons Saddam Hussein doth keep.
‘Tis told that now he imports yellow cake,
With which his thirst for conquest to slake.
GEORGE
Would’st thou meant the Betty Crocker mix,
And not that which push us ‘cross the river Styx!
RICHARD
Invoke not the name of Betty of Crocker!
For truly this news we hear would shock her!
Mortal danger may well face our fragile peace
>From our God of which we have only a lease,
Not ours to own ’til we have seen the light,
Contend I that first this evil we must fight!
GEORGE
As all Christian men, with you I agree,
Our cause is just, our work most holy.
TENET
Stay, my lords, let us not move too fast,
[Aside]
Though well I fear our the time to stop has passed,
[To all.]
‘Tis possible I raised my warning in haste
And prescious resources you may waste.
Of this word I bring I can not be sure,
And to act too soon may foresake any cure
Should later we find our conclusions were wrong
And find ourselves challenged by the civilian throng!
GEORGE
But this evil, this dictator, we must defeat,
Surely our people would believe ’twas no deceit?
The good of all we did pursue
Fully believing your word to be true.
Come! To the people shall we make our case,
And show that we are not off base
When claims we make of a country’s danger
When led it is by a dictator’s anger.
And should our people have a care,
Then support shall we ask of Tony Blair.
[Exeunt]
The End…?