“The worst pick-up line ever you say? Well lady, you’ve made a big mistake. I happen to be a bar census taker and it’s my job to ask how whether or not you come here. So don’t even flatter yourself about thinking that I was trying to pick you up. Ha! I’m just trying to do my job here lady. Please!”
“Well, you’ve probably never seen a Bar Census Taker because I’m the only one there is in New York City. You see, I was appointed by Mayor Bloomberg himself for this special assignment to determine the various bar-going habits of New Yorkers. I was hand-selected out of all of the mayor’s staff to perform this special task. It’s completely essential if there is to be any hope of the city recovering from its economic woes.”
“Well, of course you wouldn’t understand how a Bar Census would save the city’s economy, it’s very complicated. You’d have to be an economist to really fully understand it all.”
“Ok. So big whoop. You have a PhD in economics. You must think you’re really great. Well, um, well I’d love to, er, explain all of it to you, but… well, it occurs to me that I should really get back to doing my job since you haven’t been any help at all…”
“Yes, yes, you have a nice life too.”
“You there!”
“Excuse me, hello? Hi, I’m Jared Brennan.”
“So, do you come here often?”