Here’s a little math problem I can’t figure out:
Any common sweat-shop worker can probably rack up between $1.50 and $1.85 in a single day of intensive labor. Well, with that money they could at least buy a cup of coffee. The thing is, according to Sally Struthers, if I send her that equivalent amount of money every day, she can turn it around and save one of these kids’ lives. Why does the money have to go through Sally Struthers?
I wonder if these kids see the commercials with Sally Struthers and think, “Wow, I’ve got the equivalent of a cup of coffee, I should send it to Sally Struthers with my return address.” Maybe all she does is send them the money back with her autograph; an autograph worth more in third world countries than “Buffalo Bills: World Champions” t-shirts and issues of the Chicago Tribune announcing Michael Dukakis as the new president. “Wow, I wasn’t going to eat before, but this Sally Struthers autograph has inspired me to go out and buy lunch with my ‘cup-o-coffee’ wages.”
I bet all Sally does is send these kids a reminder note: “Hey Punjub- Quit wiping your ass with those nickels and go buy a sandwich.”
(Seth would like to apologize for the political incorrectness of this Thought, and also suggest that Third World employees should invest their money in low-risk, high-yield mutual funds instead of buying sandwiches.)