I’m a little worried writing this thought because I don’t want to seem like too much of a “guy.” I don’t want people to read this and say, “Oh, you just feel that way because you’re a guy.” But I guess, at the root of the problem I feel like my opinion is one that should be shared by everyone.
I really hate period pieces. You know, at least one a year you’ll see advertisements for some movie with a bunch of British actors in silly costumes and all the critics will refer to it as a period piece. Now, I’ve never seen one of these films, but frankly I don’t think that should even matter. The very presence of this type of movie disgusts me.
I’m a pretty open-minded guy. I feel like I have a pretty healthy view of menstruation. But do I need to see a movie about it? I mean, yes, it’s a fact of life. Even more so, it’s part of the wonderful process by which new life is created. But it’s not really a pleasant or necessarily fun thing and it’s certainly not something I want to watch a movie about.
And why are these movies always taking place in the past? What’s the deal with all of the costumes? And why does it seem like the British are so into this stuff? Is Emma Thompson really that fired up about menstruation that she wants to keep making these movies about it?
I mean, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m just a stupid guy who doesn’t get it and has no idea what it’s like to be a woman and doesn’t understand why watching movies about menstruation is awesome.
But think of it this way. Pooping is a fact of life too. Is pooping so entertaining? Would we really enjoy movies where pooping is the joke? Do we think toilet humor is funny? What about farting? A big laugh riot?
Ok, ok, well it seems that actually people seem to love those things. In fact, I don’t think a comedy has been released in the last ten years without some poop scene.
Well, I guess maybe I’ve been too hasty. Looks like maybe I should check out one of these period pieces after all.
(Gets up from computer)
(Drives to Video Hut)
(rents video)
(gets caught in extended conversation with Mrs. Jordanopoulos)
(leaves store)
(watches video)
What the-…? Hey now! Gagagagooey! This isn’t about menstruation! It’s about a period of time! Man, I guess I have to take back some of what I said. This movie isn’t disgusting after all!
But boy is it ever boring.