On Iraq and Moustaches

Well, it seems that we are on an inevitable path to war with Iraq. There are many reasons being batted about for why we should just get it over with: the building up of chemical/biological/nuclear weapons, connections with worldwide terrorists and oppression of his people. But the Bush administration doesn’t want you to know the truth. One look at the entire executive branch shows you that the real reason we are going to war with Iraq is mustaches. They’ve got ’em and we don’t. Big, bushy, luscious, thick, dark and sixth adjective mustaches. Mustaches make you look manlier and no one ever gives it a second thought if they see a man with a mustache drinkin’ a forty or wearing a wife-beater, or both. The advantages are endless, unlike this thought.