Outside of adopting children, there’s nothing trendier for your average celebrity than charity work. Everybody loves to see the big people lending their hands to the small people. Or maybe instead of actually lending a hand they contribute however many millions slipped through the cushions of their divans. Well, I’ve got something for celebrities to do that’s easier than any of that, because there’s nobody more needy than the good folks of TJ Monkey’s. What do we need? Free celebrity advertising.
I mean, somewhere out there some famous person is searching for badass cars or Rivers Cuomo and they’re stumbling onto everybody’s favorite comedy site. OK, everybody’s favorite comedy site that posts thoughts of the day. Alright, alright, everybody’s favorite comedy site that posts thoughts of the day from people who used to go to Duke University. Sheesh. The point is, one celebrity could give us the fame we so desire and then we could be celebrities. And then we could pass good deeds on to three people and they’d pass it on in turn and everybody would be happy until cute little Haley Joel Osment gets killed off for no good reason.
Imagine if instead of his regular suit, Dan Rather painted “www.tjmonkeys.com” on his chest and went shirtless for a newscast! That’d be awesome!
Or now that her and Billy Bob have broken up, Angelina Jolie won’t be wearing a vial of his blood around her neck anymore. So she can replace that with a laptop that’s constantly connected to the internet and logged on www.tjmonkeys.com! And it’ll hang around her neck! Woohoo!
Or when Keanu Reeves wins the Oscar for Best Actor, he could change around his acceptance speech a little bit. “I’d like to thank my Lord and Savior, through whom all things are possible. www.tjmonkeys.com!” Rock!
So if you’re out there reading this and you’re a celebrity, give us a little free advertisement. Or you could always adopt us. Especially if you’re Catherine Zeta Jones. ZazazaZOOEY!