Bet you’re surprised to see this name in your email inbox, huh? Well, believe me when I say that I wouldn’t be writing if it wasn’t important. I don’t want to butt into your new life, and vice versa, I’m sure. But something’s been nagging at me, and I need to get it out there.
I saw Amelie last week. You know, Amelie, that French film. Nominated for 5 Acadamey Awards? You know the one. You saw it when it came out, I remember. And you told me not to see it, because I wouldn’t like it. It’s “too French”, you said.
Well, guess what, Sandy? I liked it. In fact, I liked it a lot. I’d even go so far as to say I loved it! And she was so cute, Amelie was! And the characters with their quirks – delightful. Even a bare breast or two for the hoi polloi.
Don’t you see the implications of this? Perhaps it seems trivial to you. But it speaks to a much larger issue. I mean, if you were wrong about that, who’s to say what else you could have been wrong about? Maybe I would have liked that Peach Melba from Stefan’s. Perhaps I’d have very much enjoyed V.C. Andrews’ Flowers In The Attic. And isn’t it just possible I’d have fallen in love with Tijuana, despite the heat, my proclivity for rashes, and my abhorence of the siesta? Those opportunities were ripped from me. And now we’ll never know. What’s worse, I’ll never know.
Did you even know me at all? I mean, who did you break up with? Was it me, because I liked Amelie and the guy you broke up with wouldn’t have. Maybe you dumped the person you thought I was and not the person I am. It may just be that, through some psychological paradox, we are in fact still together. Three years and running. What would Ryan think of that? Yeah, I don’t think he’d like it either.
But you know what? Bygones have gone by. The river runs swiftly under this bridge. And the Past is quite fond of the issue, so let’s just let him keep it. I suppose my intent here was just to prevent someone else falling victim to the same womanipulation. Make sure you know a guy, I mean really know a guy before you go telling him what he’d like and what he’d not like. The conditional tense is dangerous. Don’t just go throwing it around blind to the consequences. I am living, breathing proof of those consequences.
Anyway, I’ve got to jet. Diems to carpe, all that. Take care of yourself, and keep enjoying my black t-shirt.
Oh, and Happy Birthday!
Love,